I Never Expect the Glitter

I never expect the glitter. My sister's daughter was the first girly-girl I ever witnessed. My sister was never girly - not a tomboy, but never pink and glitter. None of my friends were pink and glitter. Most of them were the geeky smart kids.
I really thought the glitter-pink girls were a minority. Maybe, when I was fourteen we were still coming out of the whole 'woman's movement', so girls weren't allowed/encouraged to be pink?

I saw an ad for a Tonka truck thing, and the pitch line was something like, 'Boys are made different'. Imagine saying that in the seventies, when the woman's movement tried to make everyone believe we were all equal in strenghts and weaknesses. They seriously pushed the belief that boys and girls were born the same, and it was what we taught them that made them like dolls or trucks.
I guess it ended when one of the libbers had a boy, and he yanked off his doll's arm and pretended it was a gun. :)

Country Doesn't (Always) Suck

I'm sick of people who say country music sucks. Some of the most musically open-minded people I know will freely rag on country music. I don't like rock-country, but there is a lot of country music I do like.

Locally, starting on December 1st two of our very few radio stations switch to all Christmas music. I don't hate Christmas music, but there are only three songs I really like - in order - Walking in a Winter Wonderland, Christmas in Killarney, and Blue Christmas. I can stand a few others, but those are the only ones I have to hear.
Missing those two stations, I go up and down the FM. We have three commercial-free stations. I love them, but when they're playing something I don't like, or no one has showed up for a shift so it's dead-air, I put on country. Yes. Yes, I do.

I like real country music. The kind of songs that are usually hilarious, or tear-jerking. I don't like music where the artist is obviously using country to crack the Top 40 chart. I don't like a lot of the I'm so proud to be white trash songs, though I wouldn't put 'Friends in Low Places' in that category. Is that because I like it, or because it doesn't fit? Hmm...
I don't like sissy voiced men. Nothing is worse than a high-pitched man singing country. Argh! Go sing Scottish ballads, already!

Anyone who is open-minded musically, but derides country has a problem. Some are musical snobs. Maybe, most. A few I know, say what they think everyone thinks, though I doubt they know if they honestly think it themselves. I have friends who will groan in disapproval at the slightest twang in a voice or steel guitar, before they even hear enough of a song to judge it. What is up with that? How can they hate every aspect of a musical genre?

Autumn

memories of summer lie
scattered
drifting and curling on a breeze
more brilliant, though fragile and threadbare
I love fall. I love the cool air and the colours of the leaves. I love that Orion comes up high enough for me to see him.

I have trouble driving in fall. I don't like driving. I simply do not trust anyone else on the road. I've seen too many stupid things happen, so driving is frightening. I do some stupid things myself.

The leaves are so pretty.
Where is Orion?
That cloud looks like a fluffy, old-fashioned telephone, with someone talking on it.
The moon is huge! Wait, where did it go? Is that it behind those trees?
Look at that sunset!
I shouldn't be trusted on the road. I need someone who enjoys driving. Not just driving. They have to enjoy driving and having someone ramble on about everything that passes by.

Why? No, Really?

My sister gave me a gift yesterday. Who doesn't love getting gifts?

This was a horrible gift. It wasn't a bad shirt, an ugly necklace, some girly thing that I have no use for - I've asked for a jigsaw for years. Do I get one? No. Never.

My sister got me a Boyfriend in a Box. Oh, how I laughed!

Honestly, I tried very hard not to look disgusted. If you don't date often, people think gifts like this are HILARIOUS! I'm past mustering a chuckle. It wasn't so much that it was a insulting, passive-aggressive gift, as it was that he was ugly. They have something like nine possible boyfriends. This guy was the second ugliest. He has that thin, freckly skin and a moustache. He honestly looked like a guy she tried to fix me up with when I was seventeen. Seems like 20 years later she would have caught on, that isn't my taste.

Speaking of taste, I like blonds now. I don't know why. I've never, ever, ever, liked light-haired men. The lightest haired guy I ever dated had light brown hair with a hint of red.
I'm still not taken with blue eyes, which is a bit of a dilemma. Many blond men have blue eyes. Yeah, I have no point there. It just confuses me. I've always liked dark, straight hair, now I'm turning my head to check out curly-headed blonds? How can a change like that occur, almost overnight?

Christmas Balloons

I was shopping the other day. When I came to the checkout, I looked up at the balloons. Most grocery stores now have balloons tied to the lane light as an impulse item. There are usually 'Happy Birthday', a smiley face, and the obligatory holiday balloon. I've seen all the holiday balloons - at least, I thought I had. The usual suspects are St. Patrick's Day or Valentine's Day, though I don't know anyone who wouldn't club someone for getting them a balloon for Valentine's Day. I don't like chocolate, but a balloon?

So, glancing up I see the balloons. They are Christmas balloons! I was shocked, stunned, something other than curious...

I have never seen a Christmas balloon. I don't even know how to process that information. I don't think it's sacrileges. I don't think it's neat. I simply do not know what to make of it. Balloons don't fit with Christmas. Sure, plenty of things have found their way into the Christmas holiday. Maybe, the first time someone put up blinking lights, it threw someone else off.

For some reason, those two things cannot exists as a merged unit in my brain. I love balloons. I love Christmas. It's been two days and I still find myself stopping a few times a day and saying, 'Christmas balloons?', aloud.

One and No One

Trapped behind the glass
Send out a tiny tap
Look around and see
Crowds tapping, shouting, all around me

There's ten and twenty smiling girls
Times the ten and twenty more
And they all see what I can see
They all seem the same as me

There's one who is the front and center
Don't know who and can't resent her
Like to see what she can see
Like to have those eyes on me

I can be out-shouted, out-spoken, undone anyhow
If I ever doubted, that would be now

Get-Away Car

Call me idealistic
I believe in till death do
Partners in crime
Riding on, riding through

We're in this together
So, I'll drive, I'll drive
I believe in forever
So, I'll drive, I'll drive

Call me fatalistic
But, I never thought I'd find
Yang to my yin
A like one, a like mind

Call me deistic
But, with God as my witness
Never say never
Never say, nevermore

One Shining Needle

Viewed from the window
You're always in good light
The distance is a world away
And still you can incite

A gem, a needle
Hay in my hair
I'm over here
and you're over there

Pounding a way out
From years of holding in
Convince myself, you'll never know
To rise above the din

The closer I look
The less I want to know
Try to crush the spells allure
Instead, I watch it grow

Orion

Something is not right with Orion. I don't know much about astronomy, and no, I'm not going to break into song. I do know Orion. Like a lot of people, Orion is my favourite constellation. Probably, because he is so easily recognizable - or his belt, at least. My second favourite is the Pleiades, or Seven Sisters. Not as well known, but a lovely cluster to the right of Orion's belt.

Every fall, I'm excited to see Orion appear. Excited like, 'There's my man!' He's an old friend who shows up in the fall and keeps me company through the winter. Any cold winter night, when I'm out in the dead of night for one reason or another, and the world is asleep, he's up there in the sky. Orion and snow-angels are the only things that get me through the winter months without as many complaints about being cold. But, something has happened to Orion.

Last year he was in a different position in the sky than he had been in every year previous. Everyone I asked about it said I was crazy, but most hadn't paid him any mind since they were children. He was higher than he should have been - almost overhead. He's never been overhead. I've lived in the same place for ten years, and he's always been at the same degree through those years, except last year. There are tons of astronomy enthusiast. I thought I could find some mention of why the constellation was in a different position. I found only one crazy site:
http://www.zetatalk.com/index/earthrv8.htm
Last night, I was outside, late at night, and decided to see if Orion had risen enough for me to see him. I couldn't find him at first, then I spotted Pleiades. I followed it left, to where I thought Orion's belt should be, but it wasn't there. It didn't make sense, so I looked around the area, and there it was, Orion's belt. Only, it wasn't the familiar left-to-right belt we all know. It was up-and-down, like a stoplight! Impossible, right?
I've never seen Orion's belt straight up-and-down, but there it was. If I had a better camera, I would have taken a picture, but my digital is just a cheap one I got for web photos. No chance it could take a decent shot of the night sky.
I don't know why there's no mention of it anywhere. It must be some type of normal change, otherwise there would be posts by alarmed amateur astronomers all over the net. All I do know is, I want to know why.

God and my Router

Does God care about the internet? More importantly, does God care about my internet access?

Until yesterday, I would have said, no. Why would He care? There are far more important issues in the world, than whether I can use my dialup and DSL on the same phone line. Yet, He does have the whole omnipotent thing going, so I guess there's always room for something new.

See, I've been having trouble using my dialup with the DSL. I could take apart my computer and slap in a network card and use DSL on it, but I simply don't want to. I know it's faster, better, blah, blah, blah. I don't want, and I'm not going to. I like the machine I use for dialup and I'm not taking any unnecessary risks with it. Not going to happen.

I was ready to have the DSL taken out or, at least, moved to the main phone line. I pulled out all my Verizon paperwork to call them in the morning. I put the paperwork on my keyboard, because my desk is filled with things I'm getting to, eventually. I really only get to the things I've put on the keyboard, and that's only so I can move them from the keyboard to use it.

That was two nights ago. That night, I was saying my prayers and part of me was thinking about how I'll miss using the DSL on my other systems. Some say, God doesn't talk to people. Some say, anyone who thinks He does is schizophrenic. All I know is sometimes when I'm praying a little voice tells me the simplest solution to some problem I think is too much for me.
I'm sure people without faith would say it's merely my subconscious, but when it's a problem I've tried to solve and can come up with no solution, even through waiting for my lazy subconscious to suggest something, prayer works.

The little voice said, "Turn on the firewall in the router, instead of on the computers." Hmm... would that work? My problem had been hang-ups and dropped connections. I couldn't figure out what was causing them. Maybe, if the router isn't firewalled, it's getting hit and that added 'noise' is making my dialup crash?

The next day, yesterday, I tried it. I turned the firewall on in the router. Last night I spent two hours reading all about the crazy belief that telomeres prove evolution. TWO HOURS - with nary a dropped line.

God sure knows his internet access.

Captcha

Spammers are some of the smartest people around. They often say of evil people, 'if they only put their knowledge towards good...' I was listening to Leo Laporte (secret crush since he was Dev Null) on the radio. He mentioned a new technique used by spammers to get past the CAPTCHA system used for verification.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CAPTCHA
Seems, they've set up a virtual stripper who'll take off an article of clothing, if you type in the captcha image code. Then, their system uses your inputted info to gain access to a site they couldn't, otherwise!
http://techguylabs.com/radio/ShowNotes/Show402
I'm always impressed with the way spammers get around what seems like the most brilliant idea in security. A few years ago, there was a virus that would email a copy of something in your My Documents folder to someone else. This was a fun virus. I never had it on my system, but I did get a few files from it. One was a resume. One was a presentation. It was neat. A bit like when you find a note somewhere and read it - seeing a little slice of a strangers life. From those stray notes, over the years, I've learned that everyone writes 'toilet paper' on their grocery list as 'TP'. Either that, or on all the grocery lists I've found, every one was meeting someone with those initials at the store.
The most interesting way I've seen for verifying a human is behind a post was a simple equation - 2 + 3 = ____ and you had to fill in the blank to post. This might have been on Laporte's site. I'm sure this could be easily scripted to by-pass, but if it isn't used on many sites, the spammers wouldn't bother. Anything that becomes the universal way to verify will be broached. Best advice? Keep it creative. Keep it unique. That way, no one will bother.
How about questions like: Newscaster for the Peacock station, last name only ________.
With revolving questions like that, it would take a lot of work to break the code.

Minature Robot

I think a tiny robot is in my house. You know how you can tell you have a pest, because they are kind enough to leave a little something behind? Mice leave little, black, 3D commas. Camel-back crickets leave something that looks like minuscule birds were around. This is what I found on my floor today:

These were sitting side-by-side - the penny is only to show their size. They are rubber. They are O-rings. They are very, very small. I can only guess they were left by a very small robot.

I don't know what a robot-trap looks like. I don't know what bait to use. I doubt a local exterminator would take my case.

Crush

Yesterday, I added 'Current Crush' to my profile. A friend saw it and sent me a bunch of links for Mike Doughty pages. I wrote her back and asked her what her problem was, didn't she understand a crush? Turns out, she doesn't!
I didn't know there was a girl out there who didn't know the basics of having a crush. The first rule of crush is never, ever get more information
This is really the most important rule.
Perhaps, a brief description of a crush is necessary? The dictionary, well dictionary.com, defines thusly:

15.Informal.
a.an intense but usually short-lived infatuation.

Personally, I think infatuation is too strong.
I have years of experience on crushes. I have had a crush on a rock before. I still harbor a crush on Jack Skellington. So tall, thin, clever, witty... ::swoon::
Where was I? Ah, yes. Crushes are very fragile things. Like analogies, they do not hold up to scrutiny. A crush can be broken, yes broken, by a word, an action, a tiny bit of information that doesn't fit the slim boundaries of the crush.
My current crush is based solely on the album Haughty Melodic. The music, lyrics, voice of Mike Doughty. It doesn't, as is the case with many crushes, have anything to do with the real, flesh-and-blood Mike Doughty. He would only spoil the crush. He's a decent looking fellow, from the liner notes, so I mean him no ill-will.
How old is he?
Don't tell me!
Is he married with tons of little children with lovely unique names?
I do not want to know.
Who are his influences? Where was he born? How tall is he?
Good gravy! What a way to mess things up!
A crush is simply liking someone or something for that one thing you know it by at the time. A crush is not wishing you could meet them. A crush is taking that one little piece you see and admiring it. It's like looking at a man's wrist and admiring the way that small bone stands up and throws a light shadow. The slim line of the wrist giving way to the broad base of the palm. That wrist is the crush. To see the rest of the arm or, horror of horrors, the person, would likely break the crush.
Crushes are fragile little things. They required no work, but a little protection.

I Ruined Halloween

I didn't mean to ruin Halloween. I love Halloween. I've always had fun dressing up and have never - not once - resorted to the sexy kitty/nurse/devil costume.
They say what you dress like on Halloween reflects who you'd like to be. In that case, I would like to be a zombie, cave girl, burglar, Adam Ant - many things - but never a sexy kitty. I've never worn a pre-made costume. I used to plan my costume in July or August, but recently I've been winging it later in the year.
I would have loved to try a female Jack Sparrow, but I've seen too many, so I never got the chance. I did dress as Mia from Pulp Fiction the year that was released, a giant needle sticking out of my chest and all, but I try to avoid the usual suspects.

I started a new job three years ago. Everyone I work with is very creative, except when it comes to Halloween. They all donned the basics - vampires, little kids, as-sexy-as-you-can-get-away-with-at-work kitties. I showed up the first year in one of my made-up costumes. They all said they liked it. The second year, my boss said she gave the prize away too soon, when she saw my costume. The third year, people threw on cat ears or a witch's hat. This year... barely anyone bothered.
I couldn't figure out how it had gone from a fun event, to a non-event. Then, someone cheerily pointed out that this year I hadn't dressed for Halloween - not really. At the time, I just shrugged. I thought I was following their lead. I can wear my costumes to parties and events, why dress at work?
The more I thought about the look on her face when she realized I hadn't put any effort into a costume, the more it bothered me. She was pleased I hadn't dressed. Pleased.

I think I ruined Halloween. They were all very happy to pull out a pre-made costume and slap it on. Then, I came along with my weird, self-made stuff and they simply didn't want to bother to meet the new curve. They all gave up. It's an empty victory and a competition I never meant to create.
Maybe, I'll ask off for Halloween next year?

People Stink

A couple of nights ago, I went to a club to see a band. I haven't been to a club in a while. I've been to outside concerts and festivals, but I got tired of the smaller clubs and stopped going. About a half-hour after I got there, I realized something - people stink.

It hadn't been a hot day, and I'm not talking B.O. stink. There was a strong smell of some who hadn't washed their hair in a while - and it couldn't have all been coming from the guy with the dreds to his waist. It was a fair day and it was early in the evening. I wouldn't think their daily shampoo would wear off so quickly(?) Many, many people smelled like garlic.

It's odd, garlic smells so good raw or in food, but once someone eats it they smell horrible. It's like if you ate a rose and smelled like mold after. Every day I talk to at least one person who smells like garlic - or 'after-garlic'. I'm sure they had a delicious lunch, but must we all suffer for their stomach? There are thousands of mints on the market - pick one up, already!

One guy smelled like smoke, another like good cologne. A large woman standing next to me smelled like some old, inexpensive, men's cologne - I think it was Old Spice. It was a cornucopia of scents and the majority were not pleasing.

I don't have that sensitive a nose. I used to frequent a club that smelled like Oil of Olay and Dr. Pepper. It was a strange mix, but I liked it. I don't mind the smell of smoke. I like the smell of algae. But, I don't like the smell of dirty hair. That seemed the most prevalent scent.



If it was a metal band, or a reggae band, I might understand that particular smell, but this was They Might Be Giants! A geek band. Geeks are supposed to be squeaky clean. Maybe, they were all up for days writing code?

As the night played out, the passing strangers started to smell more like beer. Sadly, it was a welcome change.

Girl, We Need to Talk

I've only once watched Katie Couric on CBS's Evening News. From the ratings, not many are watching her. But, I know how she could bust up the all-boys-club for good. Her ratings would go up. The mere controversy of her newscasts would bring in more viewers, feedback - she could rule the airwaves. Honestly, this would work.
The only problem is, she would have to make a very difficult decision - would she be willing to report the news accurately and without bias? Would she be willing to tell all the news, instead of only the parts she and her producers want the audience to know? Could she do it, without gritting her teeth or rolling her eyes through the entire broadcast?
People throughout history have sold their souls for money and fame. Couric, as the first woman of network news, owes the women of this country. She's making a mess of things and it's reflecting badly on all of us. It's time for her to sell her soul, or at least put in on the shelf during the newscast and take a stand for all women.
It's really quite simple. All Katie Couric would have to do is report actual news - news that's overlooked by the rest of the broadcasts, because it doesn't fit their world view.

"What news?" You may be thinking...

I found a site a few weeks ago, and I am addicted. It's called NewsBusters. I thought I was hearing all the news, turns out I was getting select news stories or sometimes only some of the story!
Did you know a British court said a disclaimer must go with any school viewing of Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth, because there are at least nine factual inaccuracies? I didn't hear that on the nightly news. Did you know Rush Limbaugh sold a libelous letter, written by Harry Reid, on eBay for a historic amount to go to charity - and Limbaugh is matching the funds himself? Not only that, he asked the representatives who signed the Reid letter to do that same, and they didn't even acknowledge it? How about the Hillary Clinton campaign and questionable Chinese immigrant funds? These aren't rumours, gossip or innuendo. These are actual news stories that aren't being reported on the network news!

If Katie Couric reported half of things I've read in the last few weeks, I'd watch. Others would watch as well. Especially, those who aren't use to these stories getting out. Those who like to spoon-feed us what they want us to hear. They'd probably try to drum her from the airwaves to stop her. They would cause a controversy that would make everyone tune in to see what she was saying that they so opposed, and you know what that would do?

That, girl friend, would guarantee her success!

Tired of the Same Old Thing?

Ladies, are you tired of the same old monthly routine?

Bored by a regular cycle and consistency for years on end?

Like a wonderful surprise ending, sometime between 35 and 50, you too will know the joys of perimenopause!

Never a dull moment, perimenopause will give you the change and excitement you desire!

Always had a friend with incapacitating cramps? Never knew why she was such a baby about it? No worries - one month you'll feel for yourself.
Heard of those who breakout the week before their period, but you were spared? I know you've always felt left out. Now, you'll get to experience it yourself!
Long periods, short periods, flooding, all this will be yours for an unknowable length of years! Every month you''ll get to experience symptoms you've only read about.
Never experienced bloating? No worries! You find out why other women keep pants, two sizes bigger than their normal size!
Heard rumours of breast tenderness? One month you'll resort to putting cotton balls in your bra, just to spare yourself from the pain!
Each month will be a different set of symptoms, so there's never a dull moment. Check it out, sooner than you think!

It's Perimenopause!

[note: not for those under 35 without special circumstances]

Twilight the movie - casting

I checked out Stephenie Meyer's page about the casting of the Twilight movie. I am sooo disappointed. I could not disagree more on the casting of Edward Cullen and Bella Swan. The actor Meyer would like for Edward looks like he would smack his girlfriend around, something Edward would never do.
The actress for Bella... argh! She looks pouty and arrogant - is that Bella in your mind?

Much better for Edward Cullen is Meyer's choice for Carlise - Charlie Hunnam. Here are my personal casting preferences:
Edward Cullen: Charlie Hunnam
Handsome, vunerable, the perfect Edward Cullen.












Bella Swan: Alexis Bledel

Okay, so she might have to wear brown contacts, but this is Bella Swan! She's even a year older than the Edward I like.

She's perfect.















Alice Cullen: Jena Malone

I've heard a lot of talk about Jena Malone playing evil characters. What better way to break out of type-casting than to play Alice?
She has the pixie face, she's not too tall, and I just saw her in an interview with an Alice Cullen haircut!













Victoria: Avril Lavigne

Look at that image. Tell me that isn't Victoria? She even has those teeth! Meyer's said no one who isn't an actor, but Victoria doesn't really say much.
Tiny Avril dancing about with an evil look is frightening. This is Victoria!

Vampire Romance?

I am not a reader of Vampire stories. I am not a reader of Romance stories. I would rather poke my eyes out with a very, very pointy stick, than to go anywhere near either genre.

However, someone begged me to read a book - Twilight, by Stephenie Meyer - and, reluctantly, I did. More than read, I devoured it. After finishing it, I read New Moon. Then, I waited patiently for the library to have a copy of Eclipse available. Not only did I survive reading a series of Vampire Romance stories, I absolutely loved them.

These stories were not written for me. They are Young Adult novels. I am not a 'young' adult. My Edward Cullen is not the Edward Cullen of young girls dreams. Oddly enough, he's not even the Edward Cullen that I would imagine for myself.
That isn't to say that Edward Cullen, in his character, is different in my mind. Stephenie Meyer has made a character that is the ultimate man. The man women, young and old alike, wish existed. Okay, maybe not undead and all, but certainly the most sincere, respectful, passionate, realistic (in his thinking) man I've ever come across in fiction. There is no denying this character is fictional.

It is how Edward Cullen looks that is different to me, because I'm not the market for this book. Perhaps, the advertising for the tv show Journeyman was overboard while I read the first novel, but Edward in my mind looks like this picture. The actor is Kevin McKidd, and that is not the usual way he looks. Yes, I doctored the image a bit to give him more of an Edward Cullen look.
Now, if you do a search of images of Kevin McKidd, you will find many, many pictures of him that don't look like my Edward. He doesn't look like him all the time - maybe one out of a hundred images. The best example is a photo in the current TV Guide, but I couldn't find it on their website.

It had to be excessive advertising which set that man as my Edward. For the record, I don't like blondes, red heads, or light eyes, yet here we have it. Because I am not the target audience for this book, my Edward is a little closer to my age, rather than a teenager as he was in the book. That would be gross. My Edward Cullen is a light-haired, light-eyed, mid-thirties man. Deal with it girlies.